One of my followers on Twitter wanted to ask for my advice on her perfect man with less than perfect lovemaking skills. Here’s the email that she(rather remain anonymous) sent and the MackVice I gave her:
So, I’m caught in an interesting situation. Here’s the deal, I’m in a relationship with a man that most girls would love to be with! He has the “IT” factors (as you called it). He’ll give me his last if he has too, without me even asking… But the thing is he’s “inadequate” in more than one way. His penis is more than small, it looks like it stopped growing in the 5th grade. I know he knows it too.. So, he tries to eat the box, that doesn’t work because he tries so hard that it isn’t stimulating. And when we do have sex, he has to be drunk because I’m quite sure he has an erectile dysfunction. It’s either he comes too fast (and by two fast I mean in 45 seconds to 2 minutes) or he can’t stay up. And, I never thought this was possible, but the sex hurts! I think it’s because he’s a big dude and he’s putting so much force in to trying to ram it into me it’s painful! If I mention anything about dissatisfaction, he wants to fight… Like no kidding, he will fight me! Then, he’s insecure! I’m slightly attractive, and people tend to look… And even in front of his face, dudes try to holla at me, walk up and strike a conversation, ask for my number, oh, and my all time favorite- make sexual gestures towards me. And, I’ll be like no I have a boyfriend most of the time, but he won’t ever say anything until we are alone. Then, it’s my fault for being “too friendly.” His friends even try to get at me! (which I’ve discovered is due to him talking about our sex)
I love his heart and his mind, but his sex and his insecurities are driving me WILD. Now, I’ll be honest and say, I have my faults too, when we met I had a boyfriend, and he was number two.. I left my boyfriend, and I guess he automatically assumed it was for him. That wasn’t the reason, but that’s when we really got together.
Okay, so I guess my point is… What should I do about this sexual frustration?! Because now, sex is more like a hassle than something I used to love. And, I dont want my sexual dissatisfaction to turn into animosity towards him.
So, here’s the deal you are not exactly f^cked or even getting f^cked, how could you be(sarcasm)? Aight, so enough of the jokes…But you should break-up with him. By reading this letter it’s clear that this problem has manifested outside of you alls bedroom, it leads to him being insecure and you being unassured that you have a man that is confident in keeping and satisfying you. He doesn’t even want to talk about improving, “If I mention anything about dissatisfaction, he wants to fight… Like no kidding, he will fight me!” His package isn’t big enough, that is not exactly anything that he can improve on or enhance. If he had a good package and just wasn’t very good at sex I would suggest techniques and other things, but this isn’t the case.
However, even not considering sex the two of you started a relationship on the wrong terms, on the foundation of a crumbling relationship and relationships that begin from such situations usually never work with an emphasis on never (99%). He’s also probably insecure, because he knows you cheated on your previous partner and why wouldn’t you do the same to him. He already knows you are unsatisfied.
“I don’t want my sexual dissatisfaction to turn into animosity to him”, I would like to believe it already has or maybe it’s a slight resentment…When people start to make jokes about their condition they have already accepted it “His penis is more than small, it looks like it stopped growing in the 5th grade”. The joke was funny when I first heard it, but it sounds like you’ve been harboring this resentment for a decent amount of time.
Reasons to Leave:
Penises Dont Have Growth Spurts, Not at this Age
Started the Relationship Out of Infidelity
Animosity Towards One’s Partner with No Clear Means to Rectify
You Love Him and You Aren’t in Love with Him
You Don’t Claim Him “I’ll be like no I have a boyfriend most of the time“
Keep Dating, he doesn’t sound like the end-all be-all. You can even keep him around, but I have the strangest feeling that you won’t. You’re mind already sounded made up, before you asked this question. You just needed me to agree with you, but please don’t say theSUNK.com told you to end your relationship…small men have temper problems(J/K).